Today my car was a total and complete mess. I openly admit it. Tons of beverage bottles, paper everywhere, and worst of all, dog fluff. Bright, white dog hair courtesy of Mose.
I decided I'd go to the car wash and vacuum the interior. So today I went on a mission! Gathered quarters from EVERYWHERE and and close family members. My dad emptied his pocket change on the parts counter and we sorted through the coins. Emmy checked both in her wallet and her car. Not to mention the quarters I had already. LOTS of quarters.
I was about to leave when my dad pulled up his forklift beside me in the rental yard.
"How much did you get?"
"A shit-ton!" I exclaimed.
"A WHAT??" he asked, enunciating both words.
I just laughed and he took off on his forklift muttering "shit-ton", "shit-ton" over and over.
At the car wash I jingled the quarters into the large vacuum. I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned, throwing away crap and lint-rolling the seats.
For Christmas my sister gave me a car- backseat hammock-like apparatus that hooks on to the head rests, covering the seats, thus protecting the dark interior from Mose's fluff.
I'm excited to try it out!!
Tonight I plopped down on my mattress with all my cats. I twisted around so my legs and hips were still on the bed but I was doing a kind of back bend off of it. Blood rushed to my head and I giggled. I hadn't done that in years. The stretch felt good.
I know my blogging hasn't been constant lately and I apologize. But I've been making great strides with my book and that's one reason why I wanted to blog every day.. get myself in writing shape. I'll work at it!
Sarah
Tuesday, February 26, 2019
Saturday, February 23, 2019
Day 74- Dogs.
Dogs are the best. They really are. And I say that while surrounded by cats. Blasphemy! I know, I know. But there is a magic that happens with dogs... it's hard to sum up exactly. There are no humans as good as dogs. No humans as pure. They bring out the best in people.
My dog Otis saved my life. I've told the tale often! I wouldn't have survived without her. And god, do I miss her. I miss her so much. But as much as I miss her, I am so grateful for every moment I spent with her! It was an absolute privilege and I wouldn't give it up for anything. I still wake up sometimes, early in the morning, and reach out for her on my bed.
Mose keeps me happy, laughing, and on my toes. He likes to swipe things away from me when he thinks I'm not looking- napkins, food, and in one disastrous incident, a pack of thumb tacks. I'm about ninety-eight percent sure he swallowed one. After scouring the internet for advice I fed him several tortillas since I didn't have any regular bread. He's still around to tell the tale!
I'm not a religious person. At all. But I like the idea of a dog heaven. Dogs can live there, happy as can be, waiting for their owners. Weightless, without a care in the world. I think Otis is up there now, with my Grandpa. I know I'll meet her again someday.
I have so many good memories with dogs. When Otis was just a pup, my grandpa made a 'helmet' out of a butter tub and made her wear it when she was out with the big dogs. I remember my mom teaching our dogs to woof and howl when she said "Woogie-woogie!" I remember my dad's dog, Macky, just a pup, burying her milk bones in house plants. I remember my mom and Leo getting their border collies, and how happy they each made them.
Dogs are the best presents we could ever give ourselves. And a loving home is the best gift we can give them.
Every time I see the Raton Animal Hospital vet, Kristi, she tells me she's keeping an eye out for a pretty special pup for me, since I lost Otis. And I know I'll find one. I have a feeling it will kind of fall into my lap, like Otis did, and Mose. It doesn't take much to find a special dog- they all are! I just know I'll feel it deep in my soul.
Sarah
My dog Otis saved my life. I've told the tale often! I wouldn't have survived without her. And god, do I miss her. I miss her so much. But as much as I miss her, I am so grateful for every moment I spent with her! It was an absolute privilege and I wouldn't give it up for anything. I still wake up sometimes, early in the morning, and reach out for her on my bed.
Mose keeps me happy, laughing, and on my toes. He likes to swipe things away from me when he thinks I'm not looking- napkins, food, and in one disastrous incident, a pack of thumb tacks. I'm about ninety-eight percent sure he swallowed one. After scouring the internet for advice I fed him several tortillas since I didn't have any regular bread. He's still around to tell the tale!
I'm not a religious person. At all. But I like the idea of a dog heaven. Dogs can live there, happy as can be, waiting for their owners. Weightless, without a care in the world. I think Otis is up there now, with my Grandpa. I know I'll meet her again someday.
I have so many good memories with dogs. When Otis was just a pup, my grandpa made a 'helmet' out of a butter tub and made her wear it when she was out with the big dogs. I remember my mom teaching our dogs to woof and howl when she said "Woogie-woogie!" I remember my dad's dog, Macky, just a pup, burying her milk bones in house plants. I remember my mom and Leo getting their border collies, and how happy they each made them.
Dogs are the best presents we could ever give ourselves. And a loving home is the best gift we can give them.
Every time I see the Raton Animal Hospital vet, Kristi, she tells me she's keeping an eye out for a pretty special pup for me, since I lost Otis. And I know I'll find one. I have a feeling it will kind of fall into my lap, like Otis did, and Mose. It doesn't take much to find a special dog- they all are! I just know I'll feel it deep in my soul.
Sarah
Friday, February 22, 2019
Day 73- Valentines!
Tonight, my sister, dad and I had our belated Valentines' dinner! It was late, thanks to me. Most of last week I spent spewing chunks and it was horrid.
My dad took part of the afternoon off. One thing to know about my dad and me, whenever I'm the least bit chilly, I tell him, "Dad, I'm cold." And then he usually responds with a smartass remark. It's just us. But anyway, after work my dad picked up my sister from ACE and came to get me since I'd driven home to let Mose out. He pulled his Dodger-blue car to a halt outside my snowy-but-shoveled front walkway. I slipped out of the front door, locking it behind me. I pulled open the backseat door, seeing my breath in the cold. "Dad, I'm cold," I whined, as I hopped in the car.
"Sarah, I don't care," he replied.
We spent the drive to Trinidad laughing and chatting about work and dogs and the multitude of marijuana dispensaries and the Bohemian Rhapsody movie, which we decided to purchase copies of after dinner.
For dinner... WONDERFUL HOUSE!! And it lived up to it's name. It was a little busy when we got there, pulling into the parking lot. My dad shut off the car and we all got out.
"Dad, I'm cold," I informed him.
"Wear more layers," he advised.
Inside, the restaurant was busy and smelled delicious. We sat at a table and we all looked at menus, even though we already knew what we were getting. Our waiter was an older man who smiles constantly and teases everybody. I ordered Wonton soup with no vegetables and he nodded seriously, scribbling down on his little notepad "Extra vegetables" he read aloud. Then his eyes lit up and he laughed.
It was an exquisite meal, marred only by a mysterious fortune cookie that read:
"German proverb: No trees touch the sky."
What does it MEAN? Does anything touch the sky? Too deep for us.
We bundled back up and headed to my dad's car.
"Dad, I"m cold," I said mildly.
"Sarah, you can walk home," he suggested.
We stopped by Walmart, Dad circling the parking lot while my sister and I ran inside and purchased three copies of Bohemian Rhapsody, as a belated Valentines' gift for all of us. I don't know if you've seen it, but it's pretty phenomenal!
It's late, but I'm about to heat up my leftovers from dinner.
One more day of work, then.... SUNDAY!!
Sarah
My dad took part of the afternoon off. One thing to know about my dad and me, whenever I'm the least bit chilly, I tell him, "Dad, I'm cold." And then he usually responds with a smartass remark. It's just us. But anyway, after work my dad picked up my sister from ACE and came to get me since I'd driven home to let Mose out. He pulled his Dodger-blue car to a halt outside my snowy-but-shoveled front walkway. I slipped out of the front door, locking it behind me. I pulled open the backseat door, seeing my breath in the cold. "Dad, I'm cold," I whined, as I hopped in the car.
"Sarah, I don't care," he replied.
We spent the drive to Trinidad laughing and chatting about work and dogs and the multitude of marijuana dispensaries and the Bohemian Rhapsody movie, which we decided to purchase copies of after dinner.
For dinner... WONDERFUL HOUSE!! And it lived up to it's name. It was a little busy when we got there, pulling into the parking lot. My dad shut off the car and we all got out.
"Dad, I'm cold," I informed him.
"Wear more layers," he advised.
Inside, the restaurant was busy and smelled delicious. We sat at a table and we all looked at menus, even though we already knew what we were getting. Our waiter was an older man who smiles constantly and teases everybody. I ordered Wonton soup with no vegetables and he nodded seriously, scribbling down on his little notepad "Extra vegetables" he read aloud. Then his eyes lit up and he laughed.
It was an exquisite meal, marred only by a mysterious fortune cookie that read:
"German proverb: No trees touch the sky."
What does it MEAN? Does anything touch the sky? Too deep for us.
We bundled back up and headed to my dad's car.
"Dad, I"m cold," I said mildly.
"Sarah, you can walk home," he suggested.
We stopped by Walmart, Dad circling the parking lot while my sister and I ran inside and purchased three copies of Bohemian Rhapsody, as a belated Valentines' gift for all of us. I don't know if you've seen it, but it's pretty phenomenal!
It's late, but I'm about to heat up my leftovers from dinner.
One more day of work, then.... SUNDAY!!
Sarah
Thursday, February 21, 2019
Day 72
Had a good day off today... did almost nothing! Tomorrow we might get more snow, and I've got to get my monthly blood draw for my Clozaril. Dyed my hair and I'm quite pleased with the results! Just had a bunch of orange TicTacs and my mouth is dyed bright orange.
That's it for now. Sometimes I wonder why I write these blogs since almost no one reads them. But it's good for me! It certainly doesn't hurt.
Sarah
That's it for now. Sometimes I wonder why I write these blogs since almost no one reads them. But it's good for me! It certainly doesn't hurt.
Sarah
Wednesday, February 20, 2019
Day 71- Hair
I have been dying my hair since I was in 6th grade- I had just gone through a suicide attempt and I wanted to do something new to mark a new journey. I was in Pueblo with my mom and at the mall I had MasterCuts dye a red strip in my hair, It faded out pretty quickly. But in 7th grade I chose a DIY hair color- "Fish Bowl" by Special Effects. Blue/green. And the rest is history. My hair has literally been just about every color you can name. And I love it! It's cheerful and pretty and I enjoy it. Tonight I bleached my hair so the colors will be even brighter. Most of my hair is blue right now but I bleached a strip through it and I'm gonna throw a little pink in there. Exciting!
Tomorrow is my day off and I'm looking forward to doing very little...
Sarah
Tomorrow is my day off and I'm looking forward to doing very little...
Sarah
Tuesday, February 19, 2019
Day 70- Mose
Mose lies on the floor, his eyes barely open. He's lying on his right side, his electric blue eye looking up at me. I watch the curve of his side rise and fall with his breathing, a steady movement.
Suddenly, a cat hopping off the table in the kitchen captures his attention. With a small huff, he sits up and hoists himself up to go investigate. His nails click-clack on the kitchen floor, where he goes over to the cat and gives her a sniff and a gentle lick. The cat, who secretly loves him, weaves her way between his feet, bumping up against him. He sits on the floor and eyes the cat, who he not-so-secretly loves. He finds cats fascinating, but especially this one, Three. Oddly, Three was named "Three" long ago, before losing a leg. Now it's just appropriate for the three-legged feline.
Mose wanders over to the water dish, where he laps up a good mouthful of water. Seemingly changing his mind, he stops drinking and walks back towards the living room, dribbling the water in his mouth all over the floor.
"Mosey," I call. He looks up at me with his multi-colored eyes and comes to sit right in front of me. I'm on the couch, all curled up and warm. He blinks once, twice. "Mosey, do you want a chew stick?" I ask rhetorically. His ears perk up and he puts one big white paw on my knee. I reach over to the trunk that serves as a table and find him a rawhide chew bone. He blinks some more and starts to pant. I unwrap the bone from it's clear plastic wrapping and hand it over to him. He eagerly closes his jaws around it and carries it a few feet away, where he plops down on the floor again. He uses his paws to hold the bone up for chewing. Three the cat approaches and runs her fluffy tail underneath his nose. He looks up with a dog smile, and I smile back at him.
He's a good boy.
Sarah
Suddenly, a cat hopping off the table in the kitchen captures his attention. With a small huff, he sits up and hoists himself up to go investigate. His nails click-clack on the kitchen floor, where he goes over to the cat and gives her a sniff and a gentle lick. The cat, who secretly loves him, weaves her way between his feet, bumping up against him. He sits on the floor and eyes the cat, who he not-so-secretly loves. He finds cats fascinating, but especially this one, Three. Oddly, Three was named "Three" long ago, before losing a leg. Now it's just appropriate for the three-legged feline.
Mose wanders over to the water dish, where he laps up a good mouthful of water. Seemingly changing his mind, he stops drinking and walks back towards the living room, dribbling the water in his mouth all over the floor.
"Mosey," I call. He looks up at me with his multi-colored eyes and comes to sit right in front of me. I'm on the couch, all curled up and warm. He blinks once, twice. "Mosey, do you want a chew stick?" I ask rhetorically. His ears perk up and he puts one big white paw on my knee. I reach over to the trunk that serves as a table and find him a rawhide chew bone. He blinks some more and starts to pant. I unwrap the bone from it's clear plastic wrapping and hand it over to him. He eagerly closes his jaws around it and carries it a few feet away, where he plops down on the floor again. He uses his paws to hold the bone up for chewing. Three the cat approaches and runs her fluffy tail underneath his nose. He looks up with a dog smile, and I smile back at him.
He's a good boy.
Sarah
Monday, February 18, 2019
Day 69- Winter Weather!
We woke up to several inches of snow! More, in some areas. It flurried on and off all day, the beautiful snowflakes that actually look like snowflakes are supposed to, each individually crafted, none the same, not just fluffy things like the ends of Q-tips.
My car is pretty cool, but it's not the best in snow. So my sister came to get me in our dad's car. I had just started shoveling when she got here, and she very kindly helped me finish the front walk, steps, and around my car to the street, enough room for someone walking by. After work tonight I finished up, digging out my car entirely so I might be able to drive it tomorrow, unless it snows more.
Mose doesn't seem to really care for the snow... He's a white dog but in contrast with the stark white snow, he seems almost a little brown or yellowish, like the outside of a coffee-ring staining a white plate.
I remember Otis playing in the snow, nosing her way through the freshly fallen powder. She would look up and there would be little piles of snow on her nose. I can picture her burrowing headfirst into a drift, tail straight out behind her. I miss her so much.
There are some pretty impressive snow piles around Main Street, some as tall as me!
Which, I suppose, isn't saying much...
Sarah
My car is pretty cool, but it's not the best in snow. So my sister came to get me in our dad's car. I had just started shoveling when she got here, and she very kindly helped me finish the front walk, steps, and around my car to the street, enough room for someone walking by. After work tonight I finished up, digging out my car entirely so I might be able to drive it tomorrow, unless it snows more.
Mose doesn't seem to really care for the snow... He's a white dog but in contrast with the stark white snow, he seems almost a little brown or yellowish, like the outside of a coffee-ring staining a white plate.
I remember Otis playing in the snow, nosing her way through the freshly fallen powder. She would look up and there would be little piles of snow on her nose. I can picture her burrowing headfirst into a drift, tail straight out behind her. I miss her so much.
There are some pretty impressive snow piles around Main Street, some as tall as me!
Which, I suppose, isn't saying much...
Sarah
Sunday, February 17, 2019
Day 68- T-shirts
Today was a good, pretty typical Sunday. I slept late, did little, and had dinner at my dad's house- homemade lasagna! Yum! He had been cleaning out his big closet today and brought about 10 of my realllly old black t-shirts down, for me to sort through. Thank goodness my sister was there or I would have kept them all... Lamb of God, Children of Bodom, Avenged Sevenfold, Harry Potter, Frasier. All AWESOME, all sadly too small. I kept one because it was maybe my favorite shirt of all time- Children of Bodom with the reaper on the front and a road sign in Finnish on the back. I wore this shirt to MEET Children of Bodom in. Its priceless. I dont know what I'll do with it, maybe frame the back. But I had to keep it.
Rumor has it we can expect snow for the next few days! I love wintry weather so I'm pleased.
May this week be healthier than the last!
Sarah
Rumor has it we can expect snow for the next few days! I love wintry weather so I'm pleased.
May this week be healthier than the last!
Sarah
Saturday, February 16, 2019
Day 67
I spent my night rereading my story from the very beginning. I'm torn between "That's really good!" and "Wow, this is dumb." But I'm not listening to the negative voice. Shut up, you!
We made it to the weekend! I don't have anything I HAVE to do tomorrow, which is pretty great. I think I'm gonna work on my writing. No negative voices. Sooner or later someone's gonna have to read this thing... that will be the scariest thing imaginable! I will be caught between "Be totally honest with me!" and "Ohhhhhhhh please be kind."
Tonight was a big dance at the Convention center. I was invited but declined, staying home like the toad I am.
Happy Sunday tomorrow!
Sarah
We made it to the weekend! I don't have anything I HAVE to do tomorrow, which is pretty great. I think I'm gonna work on my writing. No negative voices. Sooner or later someone's gonna have to read this thing... that will be the scariest thing imaginable! I will be caught between "Be totally honest with me!" and "Ohhhhhhhh please be kind."
Tonight was a big dance at the Convention center. I was invited but declined, staying home like the toad I am.
Happy Sunday tomorrow!
Sarah
Friday, February 15, 2019
Day 66- Mutual Rescue!
Hey guys, chances are you are my friend on Facebook and have already seen, but just in case I wanted to tell you a little about a book coming out!
Mutual Rescue is an organization that celebrates the bonds and amazing connections people have with rescued animals. A about two years ago now, my mom suggested I send them MY story- mine and Otis'. They didn't choose to make it into a film, but I was very excited when they asked if they could include the story in a book. It's been a long process! But on April 8th, the book will be published! And, from now until the release date, every pre-ordered copy will have 10% of the purchase price donated to shelters like our very own Raton Humane Society, a VERY worthwhile cause. HERE is the link to the website, and if you do purchase the book, remember the code MRRATON so the Humane Society benefits!
I'm so excited to finally see it. I've collaborated with the writers of the book a lot, asking and answering questions, sending in photos, the whole deal. They are some of the nicest people!
Mostly I'm just glad because, though I lost her, Otis will have a little piece of forever in the book, and countless people will know about her and how she saved my life. Through blogs, I've told her story many times, but this is a new level. God, I miss her. I miss her so much. But she's finally getting the credit she deserves.
I love you forever, Otie.
Sarah
Thursday, February 14, 2019
Day 65- Recovering Nicely!
So this week was not fun. I caught the stomach flu from hell. The night before, I felt just a little funny, but a few hours later I got rammed with it like a truck! Getting sick every 45 minutes all night long, and it stayed for days! I'm finally back on the mend. I've had two different soups today and they've both stayed down, thank goodness.
Happy Valentines Day to everyone! Due to my disgusting disease I only saw one human being today, but luckily he agreed to be my valentine... my dad!
Sarah
Happy Valentines Day to everyone! Due to my disgusting disease I only saw one human being today, but luckily he agreed to be my valentine... my dad!
Sarah
Wednesday, February 13, 2019
Days 63 and 64- Puke.
I haven't forgotten about blogging, I just got side-swiped by one hell of a stomach virus. It's been days and I can't seem to keep anything down. Ugh.
Happy Valentine's day tomorrow.
Sarah
Happy Valentine's day tomorrow.
Sarah
Monday, February 11, 2019
Day 62 MONDAY
Today was fine, for a Monday! Work went pretty well. We put up the seed racks and have already sold a few packets.
After work, I went with my sister and a coworker for dinner and drinks at Mulligans, which was very nice. Double vodka cranberry, thank you very much.
Came home and watched some TV, then wrote for a while. My New Year's Resolution was to write a book in one year and I'm positive I'l make it. The only snag? This story is getting bigger and bigger and I fear I might not fit it into one book.... a series maybe. But a book is a book!
Ran a bunch of errands today... bank, dropped off some payments to be mailed, went to the Medicine Shoppe, went to Raton Veterinary Hospital, put Mose in because it was cold... just stuff like that. I get kind of stressy in the moment, but then I feel satisfied that I got everything done.
As a side note, I did make it to the Dollar Store and bought Mose some chew sticks. He was pretty pumped.
Happy birthday to Abraham Lincoln tomorrow!
Sarah
After work, I went with my sister and a coworker for dinner and drinks at Mulligans, which was very nice. Double vodka cranberry, thank you very much.
Came home and watched some TV, then wrote for a while. My New Year's Resolution was to write a book in one year and I'm positive I'l make it. The only snag? This story is getting bigger and bigger and I fear I might not fit it into one book.... a series maybe. But a book is a book!
Ran a bunch of errands today... bank, dropped off some payments to be mailed, went to the Medicine Shoppe, went to Raton Veterinary Hospital, put Mose in because it was cold... just stuff like that. I get kind of stressy in the moment, but then I feel satisfied that I got everything done.
As a side note, I did make it to the Dollar Store and bought Mose some chew sticks. He was pretty pumped.
Happy birthday to Abraham Lincoln tomorrow!
Sarah
Sunday, February 10, 2019
Day 61
Sunday today! Didn't do a whole lot, but up at my dad's house, he, my sister and I watched most of the Grammys! We all felt a bit out of the loop, seeing and hearing all these bands and singers and rappers and rockers that we did not know at all. But it's still cool to watch! It's fun to see the crazy things the musicians wear.
Lately I've gotten really, REALLY into writing, which is great! It just makes going to work kind of... wah wah wah. I just wanna WRITE! And that's a good thing.
But it's about bedtime, so I had to rip myself away from writing to be responsible. It's oh so tempting to stay up and write, but no! Bad Sarah!
Good night!!
(Good) Sarah
Lately I've gotten really, REALLY into writing, which is great! It just makes going to work kind of... wah wah wah. I just wanna WRITE! And that's a good thing.
But it's about bedtime, so I had to rip myself away from writing to be responsible. It's oh so tempting to stay up and write, but no! Bad Sarah!
Good night!!
(Good) Sarah
Saturday, February 9, 2019
Day 60- Lucky
They say black cats are unlucky. I've never believed it. But even if I did, the sheer number of black cats in my life must surely cancel all the bad luck out. I've got three at home, and one at work, whose name is, believe it or not, Lucky.
When I was very young, I was riding a horse one day, Boots. I wasn't a comfortable rider at all- very unsteady. We were walking downhill and the momentum caused me to topple off the horse, IN FRONT. In front of those bone-breaking hooves. I braced myself for the worst but it never came. This particular horse had been trained in rodeo- it stopped when I fell, expecting me to topple a calf. Apart from a few scrapes, I was fine.
One day I was playing in the back of my parents' pick up truck. I fell out, my head cracking against the pavement. I was fine!
Several years later, I was driving my family's gator, a sort of 6 wheeled vehicle. I had a drink and as I was going around a corner, the drink spilled. I made a lunge for it and over-corrected the wheel. The vehicle slammed into some trees, a huge branch smashing into the front seat just inches from my chest.
When I was twelve, I was suicidally depressed. I tried to take my own life. But my youth mixed with circumstance led me to failure. I'm thankful for that everyday.
I have mental health issues but I was born into a supportive family, and chance lead me to an amazing dog who saved my life.
I'd say I'm pretty lucky, wouldn't you?
Sarah
When I was very young, I was riding a horse one day, Boots. I wasn't a comfortable rider at all- very unsteady. We were walking downhill and the momentum caused me to topple off the horse, IN FRONT. In front of those bone-breaking hooves. I braced myself for the worst but it never came. This particular horse had been trained in rodeo- it stopped when I fell, expecting me to topple a calf. Apart from a few scrapes, I was fine.
One day I was playing in the back of my parents' pick up truck. I fell out, my head cracking against the pavement. I was fine!
Several years later, I was driving my family's gator, a sort of 6 wheeled vehicle. I had a drink and as I was going around a corner, the drink spilled. I made a lunge for it and over-corrected the wheel. The vehicle slammed into some trees, a huge branch smashing into the front seat just inches from my chest.
When I was twelve, I was suicidally depressed. I tried to take my own life. But my youth mixed with circumstance led me to failure. I'm thankful for that everyday.
I have mental health issues but I was born into a supportive family, and chance lead me to an amazing dog who saved my life.
I'd say I'm pretty lucky, wouldn't you?
Sarah
Friday, February 8, 2019
Day 59- I'm Cold Again
Still fighting a cold, but now I think I'm on the uphill side! I did became freezing cold this afternoon and had to don several hoodies and cover myself with cats- it worked!
One day tomorrow and I've got a Sunday. I do need to go shopping tomorrow... I'm out of chew sticks! It's simply unacceptable. All afternoon, Mose has been giving me "the look" and putting his paw on my knee. Poor thing.
Today was bill-paying day... never fun but it's nice to check off my list.
Been writing again, and I'm feeling really good about it! There's just this tiny, nagging bit of myself that worries if anyone will actually WANT to read it. I think it's pretty good, but what if I'm wrong? I'll have wasted a lot of time on something that doesn't matter! But for the most part I make that piece of me shut up. It's a risk I gotta take, simple as that.
Sometime in the near future I need to buy a heavy duty printer... if this book's going anywhere, it will need to be printed out eventually.
Sleep time! Good thing human illnesses don't pass through computers.
Sarah
One day tomorrow and I've got a Sunday. I do need to go shopping tomorrow... I'm out of chew sticks! It's simply unacceptable. All afternoon, Mose has been giving me "the look" and putting his paw on my knee. Poor thing.
Today was bill-paying day... never fun but it's nice to check off my list.
Been writing again, and I'm feeling really good about it! There's just this tiny, nagging bit of myself that worries if anyone will actually WANT to read it. I think it's pretty good, but what if I'm wrong? I'll have wasted a lot of time on something that doesn't matter! But for the most part I make that piece of me shut up. It's a risk I gotta take, simple as that.
Sometime in the near future I need to buy a heavy duty printer... if this book's going anywhere, it will need to be printed out eventually.
Sleep time! Good thing human illnesses don't pass through computers.
Sarah
Thursday, February 7, 2019
Day 58
Today was my day off so I stayed at home and sucked back some cold medicine. I napped a lot, too. Surprise! Just didn't do much, but I did write a WHOLE LOT tonight, and that makes me feel good. There's nothing like reading back what you've written and finding yourself nodding and smiling and realizing, "This is pretty good!"
The only problem is as it gets bigger, it's harder to deal with as a whole, if that makes any sense. It's like dealing with a loose mass and little sections keep trying to escape and you have to pull them back in.
But it's late and I'm gonna go to bed! Sleep when you're whiny and sick never hurts!
Sarah
The only problem is as it gets bigger, it's harder to deal with as a whole, if that makes any sense. It's like dealing with a loose mass and little sections keep trying to escape and you have to pull them back in.
But it's late and I'm gonna go to bed! Sleep when you're whiny and sick never hurts!
Sarah
Wednesday, February 6, 2019
Day 57- Whine
I'm sick and I'm whiny. Not a winning combination! Just got myself a nice cold. I left work early and took some liquid cold medicine and passed out for a few hours. Had some ramen noodles and lots to drink. My animals are happy I'm home but aren't particularly good at nursing me back to health! At least I've got a day off tomorrow!
I hear it's gonna be COLD tomorrow, so keep warm!
Sarah
I hear it's gonna be COLD tomorrow, so keep warm!
Sarah
Tuesday, February 5, 2019
Day 56- How NOT to be a Badass
It's a lesson it took me a lifetime to learn, and I think it's time to share it with you!
Alright kids, this is a picture of me in 5th grade.
Good stuff. But! We have to be brutally honest here, LOTR is a bit geeky. It's beautiful and epic and moving and impressive and wonderful but... just a tad geeky. Especially when you get to the level I was at. Wanna know another secret? I didn't give a shit now or then! I AM A GEEK.
Back in 5th grade, I got the best report card of my life- straight A pluses, across the board. I don't know if you remember them, but we used to get Weekly Reader magazines in school, which had a few articles and a quiz on the back. Well we got one about LOTR and I was so involved drooling over it that I got a "C" on the quiz. When the class found out, they gasped, and I was humiliated. But I still have that magazine.
6th grade itself was not pleasant for me, but it's when I began to develop my personal style. I got my first pair of bondage pants and got a BLACK Good Charlotte t-shirt that I wore with pride even though some guy friends thought Good Charlotte was "pansy punk." They were kinda right, especially considering the music I got into later but I'll tell you something else. Good Charlotte's songs are damn catchy! I was actually talking to a very old friend of mine recently and we agreed we were no longer ashamed to admit it. The songs were good and we LIKED them. We still do!
And again, we're back to dorky.
In 7th grade some guy friends asked if I would join their band as bass player. I was terrified to go that first night because I'd never hung out with just a bunch of guys before but it. Was. Awesome. I stayed bass player in that band, Asunder, and then we went through a lineup change and became Dead End Philosophy.
We had several different jamming locations and had the police called on us more than once. We always warmed up playing the first five tracks of "Ashes of the Wake."
Pretty badass, right? WRONG, MY FRIEND. I'll tell you the most painful secret of all. When I headbang too much I get dizzy and fall over. Yes, it's happened, and no, I don't want to talk about it.
So here I am, years later. I have crazy-colored hair which some might think is nerdy for a 27 year old, but I loooooooooooooove it. I say things like "pardon" and "oh, bother," which can't be considered cool. I still keep up with Elvish but additionally learned some Dothraki from Game of Thrones.
I am similar to Daenerys, the Mother of Dragons but I'm the Mother of Cats. I have three black cats and I love them to the point of being a dorky cat lady. And I've got an idiot for a dog that I adore.
So learn from my mistakes. Or, better yet, be AS DORKY as you want to be. Be what makes you happy.
Okay?
Excellent.
Sarah
Alright kids, this is a picture of me in 5th grade.
I was rockin' my red-rimmed eyeglasses, "natural" hair, and a super cool jean overshirt. Pre-braces, guys. Right around this time was when I fell in deeply, passionately in love with Lord of the Rings. I kept copies of the trilogy within arm distance and taught myself to speak Elvish. This was right around the time the first and second films were released and... I'll tell you a secret. I was too embarrassed to admit it but I had a huuuuuuuuuge crush on Legolas, played by Orlando Bloom. Pretty much me and every other girl who watched the films. Although! One of my classmates loved Viggo Mortensen, so there you go. I didn't mind the fact that Orlando was a good 15 years my senior. That long blonde hair? Sigh.
One of my best birthdays ever was in 6th grade. Because that was THE RELEASE DATE for The Return of the King so for my birthday night we went and watched it. Front row, center seats.
Good stuff. But! We have to be brutally honest here, LOTR is a bit geeky. It's beautiful and epic and moving and impressive and wonderful but... just a tad geeky. Especially when you get to the level I was at. Wanna know another secret? I didn't give a shit now or then! I AM A GEEK.
Back in 5th grade, I got the best report card of my life- straight A pluses, across the board. I don't know if you remember them, but we used to get Weekly Reader magazines in school, which had a few articles and a quiz on the back. Well we got one about LOTR and I was so involved drooling over it that I got a "C" on the quiz. When the class found out, they gasped, and I was humiliated. But I still have that magazine.
6th grade itself was not pleasant for me, but it's when I began to develop my personal style. I got my first pair of bondage pants and got a BLACK Good Charlotte t-shirt that I wore with pride even though some guy friends thought Good Charlotte was "pansy punk." They were kinda right, especially considering the music I got into later but I'll tell you something else. Good Charlotte's songs are damn catchy! I was actually talking to a very old friend of mine recently and we agreed we were no longer ashamed to admit it. The songs were good and we LIKED them. We still do!
And again, we're back to dorky.
In 7th grade some guy friends asked if I would join their band as bass player. I was terrified to go that first night because I'd never hung out with just a bunch of guys before but it. Was. Awesome. I stayed bass player in that band, Asunder, and then we went through a lineup change and became Dead End Philosophy.
We had several different jamming locations and had the police called on us more than once. We always warmed up playing the first five tracks of "Ashes of the Wake."
Pretty badass, right? WRONG, MY FRIEND. I'll tell you the most painful secret of all. When I headbang too much I get dizzy and fall over. Yes, it's happened, and no, I don't want to talk about it.
So here I am, years later. I have crazy-colored hair which some might think is nerdy for a 27 year old, but I loooooooooooooove it. I say things like "pardon" and "oh, bother," which can't be considered cool. I still keep up with Elvish but additionally learned some Dothraki from Game of Thrones.
I am similar to Daenerys, the Mother of Dragons but I'm the Mother of Cats. I have three black cats and I love them to the point of being a dorky cat lady. And I've got an idiot for a dog that I adore.
So learn from my mistakes. Or, better yet, be AS DORKY as you want to be. Be what makes you happy.
Okay?
Excellent.
Sarah
Monday, February 4, 2019
Day 55- QUICK
I was getting ready for bed when I remembered I didn't blog today. Well, hell.
We all made it through another Monday! Lots of bookwork today. I had Chinese for dinner. I've been calling Shelly "Sheldon the Conqueror" and he's proud. Most Superbowl talk I heard today was about the commercials.
Aaaaaand BLOG!
Better next time.
Sarah
We all made it through another Monday! Lots of bookwork today. I had Chinese for dinner. I've been calling Shelly "Sheldon the Conqueror" and he's proud. Most Superbowl talk I heard today was about the commercials.
Aaaaaand BLOG!
Better next time.
Sarah
Sunday, February 3, 2019
Day 54- Sarah on Sports
Today was the Super Bowl! Patriots vs. the Rams. My dad has been a Rams fan for a very long time and his allegiance and loyalty passed on to me.
Can I be honest with you? I watched the whole Super Bowl tonight, the first time I'v watched an entire game in quite some time. Mostly I just like the Super Bowl commercials because... here goes: I don't understand football. For years and today as well, patient family members walk me through the intricacies of the game but I just. Don't. Get. It. The lines and rules and lingo. All I understand is "TOUCHDOWN!!"
I talked to my mom last night because I took a massive fall outside and she wanted to check on me. I told her my plans to watch the Super Bowl and try to understand it and she laughed.
"You know there are a ton of 5 year old boys who understand it perfectly?" she teased.
But no, it just doesn't stick. Now, I have never played football in my life, and maybe if I had I'd get it more. But here are some sports I HAVE played... and still don't necessarily understand.
BASKETBALL. Okay. When I was very young, I fell in love with the movie "Space Jam" and therefore idolized Michael Jordan. I am not kidding when I say I wanted to BE Michael Jordan. Not "I wanna be like Mike!" No. I wanted to BE him. Which is ironic because now as a grown woman I am Michael Jordan's COMPLETE physical opposite.
So I spent quite a few hours outside "shooting hoops" in the driveway. "Shooting hoops" in my case meant chucking the basketball AT the backboard and chasing it when it bounced away. But I felt badass doing it.
A few years later I joined a local organization for kids of all ages. I was poor at best. Dribbling wasn't my thing, or passing. Or rebounding. Or "shooting hoops." Once, though, I got my shot at the bigs.
We were at the beginning of a new quarter and I got to start from the half-court line. Picturing Mr. Jordan I dribbled a couple times, listening to the crowd, feeling invincible. I looked at all my teammates gaping at my stillness. And then! I stepped over the line. Nope. Lost the ball.
I didn't play long after that.
SOCCER. I was on a soccer league one summer and all the details were lost on me. My plan was to follow all the other kids, at the back of the pack. Just blend in and don't mess up that way. But shit! Once or twice some fool passed me the ball. For a split second, I panicked. Then I kicked it in any direction I could. Like this scene from Superbad:
PING PONG. We got a ping pong table at our house one year. What I remember most is chasing down the balls, which rolled under desks and couches where the cob webs and spiders live. Forrest Gump makes ping pong look easy and effortless but I swung at the balls like they were a tiny bludger from Harry Potter's Quidditch.
BASEBALL. I have never played actual baseball, though I've been to many games. I DID play Wiffle-ball with my family in my Grandparent's back yard, and that was fun. However, I preferred sitting in the kid's fort with a ladder and a slide and commentate on the game at hand, as obnoxiously as I could.
KICKBALL. Oh, sweet Jesus. I HATED kickball. I dreaded the days we played in it school. I certainly can't catch, and I was even bad at kicking. The ball shot out in odd directions! And my classmates all hated me because when I WAS in control of the ball I didn't know where to kick it.
Ahhh, shut up.
MARCHING BAND. Band's a sport, right? And we WORK on our formations. I remember mid-school band, out in the road practicing for hours to be ready for the Homecoming parade. And you know what? I wasn't that bad!
Maybe I DO have a sporty side.
Yeah. Right.
Sarah
Can I be honest with you? I watched the whole Super Bowl tonight, the first time I'v watched an entire game in quite some time. Mostly I just like the Super Bowl commercials because... here goes: I don't understand football. For years and today as well, patient family members walk me through the intricacies of the game but I just. Don't. Get. It. The lines and rules and lingo. All I understand is "TOUCHDOWN!!"
I talked to my mom last night because I took a massive fall outside and she wanted to check on me. I told her my plans to watch the Super Bowl and try to understand it and she laughed.
"You know there are a ton of 5 year old boys who understand it perfectly?" she teased.
But no, it just doesn't stick. Now, I have never played football in my life, and maybe if I had I'd get it more. But here are some sports I HAVE played... and still don't necessarily understand.
BASKETBALL. Okay. When I was very young, I fell in love with the movie "Space Jam" and therefore idolized Michael Jordan. I am not kidding when I say I wanted to BE Michael Jordan. Not "I wanna be like Mike!" No. I wanted to BE him. Which is ironic because now as a grown woman I am Michael Jordan's COMPLETE physical opposite.
So I spent quite a few hours outside "shooting hoops" in the driveway. "Shooting hoops" in my case meant chucking the basketball AT the backboard and chasing it when it bounced away. But I felt badass doing it.
A few years later I joined a local organization for kids of all ages. I was poor at best. Dribbling wasn't my thing, or passing. Or rebounding. Or "shooting hoops." Once, though, I got my shot at the bigs.
We were at the beginning of a new quarter and I got to start from the half-court line. Picturing Mr. Jordan I dribbled a couple times, listening to the crowd, feeling invincible. I looked at all my teammates gaping at my stillness. And then! I stepped over the line. Nope. Lost the ball.
I didn't play long after that.
SOCCER. I was on a soccer league one summer and all the details were lost on me. My plan was to follow all the other kids, at the back of the pack. Just blend in and don't mess up that way. But shit! Once or twice some fool passed me the ball. For a split second, I panicked. Then I kicked it in any direction I could. Like this scene from Superbad:
PING PONG. We got a ping pong table at our house one year. What I remember most is chasing down the balls, which rolled under desks and couches where the cob webs and spiders live. Forrest Gump makes ping pong look easy and effortless but I swung at the balls like they were a tiny bludger from Harry Potter's Quidditch.
BASEBALL. I have never played actual baseball, though I've been to many games. I DID play Wiffle-ball with my family in my Grandparent's back yard, and that was fun. However, I preferred sitting in the kid's fort with a ladder and a slide and commentate on the game at hand, as obnoxiously as I could.
KICKBALL. Oh, sweet Jesus. I HATED kickball. I dreaded the days we played in it school. I certainly can't catch, and I was even bad at kicking. The ball shot out in odd directions! And my classmates all hated me because when I WAS in control of the ball I didn't know where to kick it.
Ahhh, shut up.
MARCHING BAND. Band's a sport, right? And we WORK on our formations. I remember mid-school band, out in the road practicing for hours to be ready for the Homecoming parade. And you know what? I wasn't that bad!
Maybe I DO have a sporty side.
Yeah. Right.
Sarah
Saturday, February 2, 2019
Day 53- Thoughts of a Hardware Geek
As you may/possibly/probably know by now, I work at ACE Hardware! It's not a glamorous job, nor a particularly clean one. There's grease and gasoline and paint and mud. But today I was looking around... I looked deeper. And I found something surprising- beauty in the every day work environment!
When you pull out a brand new chain saw chain from it's box, it shimmers and shines a little bit in the light, untouched by dirty hands or greasy machines. It reminds me of taking a silvery chain out of a box at the jewelers, catching the light, like liquid starlight.
In the back of we have rolls of copper tubing that looks like someone melted thousands of dollars worth of pennies, and formed them into a mesmerizing, shiny coil, just waiting to be unrolled and stretched across space and time, once currency now something entirely different.
Upfront we have hundreds of paint chips from different companies, a mesh of regular and jewel tones, effortlessly evolving from one shade to another.
In the back behind the parts counter, there are endless dusty boxes and bags of parts for chain saws, mowers, pressure washers, you name it. It reminds me of the Department of Mysteries from Harry Potter, with the towering shelves on all sides, full of parts from tiny to huge. The containers are dirty but nestled away are the parts themselves, still shiny and unused.
The pottery aisle is packed with containers, basins, bowls, and buckets of every hue and every size you can imagine. They are all crammed together, waiting to be picked and ready to hold plants and flowers.
Even being out in the Shop has a surprising charm. The walls are covered with pegboards full of tools and Stihl calendars. There's always music playing, and it feeds the chaos. If you're fortunate, you might even see a beautiful little cat named Lucky. She owns the whole shop!
I wonder... maybe I spend a little too much time there.
Sarah
When you pull out a brand new chain saw chain from it's box, it shimmers and shines a little bit in the light, untouched by dirty hands or greasy machines. It reminds me of taking a silvery chain out of a box at the jewelers, catching the light, like liquid starlight.
In the back of we have rolls of copper tubing that looks like someone melted thousands of dollars worth of pennies, and formed them into a mesmerizing, shiny coil, just waiting to be unrolled and stretched across space and time, once currency now something entirely different.
Upfront we have hundreds of paint chips from different companies, a mesh of regular and jewel tones, effortlessly evolving from one shade to another.
In the back behind the parts counter, there are endless dusty boxes and bags of parts for chain saws, mowers, pressure washers, you name it. It reminds me of the Department of Mysteries from Harry Potter, with the towering shelves on all sides, full of parts from tiny to huge. The containers are dirty but nestled away are the parts themselves, still shiny and unused.
The pottery aisle is packed with containers, basins, bowls, and buckets of every hue and every size you can imagine. They are all crammed together, waiting to be picked and ready to hold plants and flowers.
Even being out in the Shop has a surprising charm. The walls are covered with pegboards full of tools and Stihl calendars. There's always music playing, and it feeds the chaos. If you're fortunate, you might even see a beautiful little cat named Lucky. She owns the whole shop!
I wonder... maybe I spend a little too much time there.
Sarah
Friday, February 1, 2019
Day 52- Tumble
This morning I fell down a couple of stairs outside. And it hurt!
There are two sets of concrete steps in my back yard- the first and longer set goes from my back door down to the ground level. The second is a set of two steps that descend from the ground level down to the yard level. THANKFULLY I didn't fall down the big steps because I would have cracked my head a good one!
It all happened so fast I don't really remember all of it. Approaching the bottom stairs, I was going to put Mose in his pen while I went to work. At the same time a neighbor was throwing his trash in the alley dumpster, and Mose hurtled across the yard to bark at the intruder of privacy.
That's when it happened. I don't know if I tripped or misstepped but suddenly my feet were slipping out from under me and I was hurtling down past the stairs and towards the cement walkway. WHAM. I felt it in my right shoulder first, the concrete slamming my upper arm. My glasses went flying! My left knee shot out, trying to steady my body and it scraped across the pavement. My air was knocked right out of me and I had to lie there for a minute, my hip aching.
"Are you okay??" the neighbor called.
I wanted to yell back, "You weren't supposed to see that!" but I just gave a weak, "Yeah."
I tried pushing myself up into a kneeling position and my arm trembled under the weight. My hair was full of tiny twigs and my pants were a muddy mess. It took a good few minutes to find my glasses, since I couldn't see, but thankfully they were unharmed.
But the worst part of it all? Mose didn't even notice!
Tonight I'm achey all over, and I've been taking Advil which helps a bit. I think I'll be a sore, whiny mess tomorrow...
Sarah
There are two sets of concrete steps in my back yard- the first and longer set goes from my back door down to the ground level. The second is a set of two steps that descend from the ground level down to the yard level. THANKFULLY I didn't fall down the big steps because I would have cracked my head a good one!
It all happened so fast I don't really remember all of it. Approaching the bottom stairs, I was going to put Mose in his pen while I went to work. At the same time a neighbor was throwing his trash in the alley dumpster, and Mose hurtled across the yard to bark at the intruder of privacy.
That's when it happened. I don't know if I tripped or misstepped but suddenly my feet were slipping out from under me and I was hurtling down past the stairs and towards the cement walkway. WHAM. I felt it in my right shoulder first, the concrete slamming my upper arm. My glasses went flying! My left knee shot out, trying to steady my body and it scraped across the pavement. My air was knocked right out of me and I had to lie there for a minute, my hip aching.
"Are you okay??" the neighbor called.
I wanted to yell back, "You weren't supposed to see that!" but I just gave a weak, "Yeah."
I tried pushing myself up into a kneeling position and my arm trembled under the weight. My hair was full of tiny twigs and my pants were a muddy mess. It took a good few minutes to find my glasses, since I couldn't see, but thankfully they were unharmed.
But the worst part of it all? Mose didn't even notice!
Tonight I'm achey all over, and I've been taking Advil which helps a bit. I think I'll be a sore, whiny mess tomorrow...
Sarah
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